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Do you know any good clarinet jokes ?

Clarinet Jokes

Q: How do you get a clarinetist out of a tree?
A: Cut the noose.

Q: Why do clarinetists place their cases on the dashboard?
A: So they can park in handicapped spaces.

Q: What do you call a bass clarinetist with half a brain?
A: Gifted.

Q: What do you get when you remove half a bass clarinetist's brain?
A: An even more gifted contrabass clarinetist.

Q: What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?
A: No one cries when you chop a clarinet into little pieces.

Q: How many clarinetists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Only one, but he'll go through a whole box of bulbs before he finds just the right one.

Q: What's the definition of a nerd?
A: Someone who owns his own alto clarinet.

Q: Is there any difference between the sound of a clarinet and that of a cat in heat?
A: Of course there is, but only if the cat's in good health.

Q: How do you put down a tenor saxophone?
A: Confuse it with a bass clarinet.

Q: What's the purpose of the bell on a bass clarinet?
A: Storing the ashes from the rest of the instrument.