peacechic
i have been cheking in on your piece to see what people have been saying... and I pplayed your song once more. personaly I thhink you should add some high chords or break out in an eerie high vibrato type thingand play it for a funiral

 oatman
the accidentals kind of sound off. maybe change those notes and people will be all over your piece. just saying.

 peacechic
I tottaly aggree with Amanadanistic, There should be a little more spice to your soup... Without that all you have is some really gross potatoes and broth. No mean to be rude but try to rewrite it to something that you feel in your heart.

 jrhallman
You really shouldn't write whole notes out of key. if your going to incorporate notes outside the scale you should make them shorter, maybe sliding into another note. And as with the other people, if this is a single instrument piece it needs more.

 Amanadanistic
I agree with the other guys. You definitely need a little spark in your piece. Faster notes, maybe a key change. I wouldn't really call it jazz.

 tigerstar
The song is too 'lifeless', you should add some more faster notes inbetween the long ones and another instrument in it.

 LifeAndFire
is so void... add something, like strings tremolo or drums, i dont know, use your creativity